This is The Church of COVID, our members are The Covidians, our doctrine is The Science™. Our religion is still new and evolving, so i'll update this periodically as new revelations come down from on high. This is here so that everyone can stay on the same page.
Structure of the divine pantheon
Dr. Fauci (578 masks be upon him) is our prophet, his body is host to the spirit of public health they are one in the same, he is the most holy being in existence what he says goes.
One tiny step below him is a host of Arch Angels - divine figures of such influence that their pronouncements are used by the Arch Cardinals to create laws and edicts which we must all follow - they must also be praised.
Below the Arch Angels is the Arch Cardinals – divinely inspired humans that lead over some geographical area be it a city, state, province, or entire country, that has used the wisdom of Fauci or the Arch Angels (10K masks be upon them) to design holy policy that protects us all - we hold them in reverence but do not have to praise them when we speak their names.
Why do you say ‘mask(s) be upon him/her/them’ when speaking the names of Fauci (375K MBUH) or one of his Arch Angels?
The Church of COVID demands that divine figures be blessed when speaking their names, the mask is holy, the more masks you wish upon someone the stronger your blessing.
Why are some pictures of The Prophet/Arch Angels/Arch Cardinals unmasked not marked NSFW?
People of this level of esteem are always masked, if you can’t see that you simply do not have enough faith. Begin self-flagellating immediately.
What is The Church’s position on vaccination?
Vaccines are The Great Prophet Fauci’s (736 Vigintillion MBUH) holy sacrament. Everyone should be vaccinated. Get every COVID vaccine. Multiple times. In fact, just get an IV drip of vaccines and take them continuously.
Aren’t you worried about side effects?
There are no vaccine side effects. Every one of what the anti-vaxxers call “side effects” we call spiritual gifts. Spiritual gifts are how you know that Fauci (9378 Billion MBUH) saw that you took the vaccine and has decided to bless you for doing so.
What is COVID in all this?
COVID is a fallen Arch Angel that possesses Anders Tegnell and is the evil that we fight against and structure our lives around, the coronavirus is the way that COVID takes control of your body, you must avoid this at all costs.
COVID has many Satans that do its bidding and spread evil, lies, and misinformation. Notably the Orange Satan, and Ron DeSatan. We will find others over time.
What happens when I die?
If you are found virtuous enough (no non-Covidians are) you will don your mask of eternal virtue and join Dr. Fauci (5.28 x 10^8 MBUH) in an everlasting Zoom call!
If you are not virtuous enough you will be placed on the ventilator of the damned and cursed to sail a hospital ship on and endless lake of fire and brimstone for eternity.
What is Faucidan?
Faucidan is like the Muslim month of Ramadan but better, it is our great celebration, a holiday of varying length and start date, where we have holy lockdowns, Zoom™ calls, and wear masks even at home to show everyone how virtuous we are.
What must I do to obtain virtue?
Members must follow all revelations and dictates from our prophet The Holy Dr. Anthony Fauci (2.6 Billion MBUH) and his Arch Angels.
The commandments are as follows:
Thou shalt not take the name of Fauci (11.41 Billion MBUH) or any other divine figures in vain. They must be praised either before or after you speak their names.
Thou shalt not be seen without your mask. Your mouth, henceforth known as face anus, and nose, henceforth known as face penis are vile and obscene, cover them up.
Thou shalt not touch anything without immediately using hand sanitizer before and after contact.
Thou shalt not question The Science™, you will know it is The Science™ because it will agree with The Holy Dr. Fauci (1.3 Trillion MBUH).
Thou shalt not come within 6' of another person without a barrier between you.
Thou shalt not attend a gathering of more than 10 people, unless it is a BLM rally, then the acceptable number is unlimited.
Thou shalt not study statistics for it is foolishness.
Thou shalt not study history for it is full of the unmasked.
You shall shame others who violate any of these commandments.
You shall show the people of the world your virtuousness through social media that they may join you. Talk about the church in other subs, and post about outrageous and holy things alike here.
Who are the Arch Angels?
We must figure that out. If you think you know who they are post here, if enough people demand it we can put it to a vote.
Here is the current list of confirmed Arch-Angels: Rochelle Walensky, Director of the CDC (5 MBUH), Xi Jinping, President of China (973 MBUH), Daniel Andrews, Premier of Victoria, Australia (297K MBUH), Jacinda Ardern, Prime Minister of New Zealand (736 Million MBUH)
What is the ritual to join The Church?
First you must connect to one or more current members via Zoom™ call as all inductions require witnesses.
You will don at least 2 masks and apologize for your nakedness.
You will face toward the CDC, kneel, and pray to Fauci (500 Trillion MBUH) that he will forgive you of your sin and denial of The Science™.
You will baptize yourself in hand sanitizer to signify your cleansing.
And that’s it, you will be a Covidian and forever saved from the ventilator of the damned!
4 /21/2021 MAJOR accomplishment BANK allows Me in WITHOUT the DEHUMANIZATION mask !! :I) I MISS THE OUT DOOR POOL
MAJOR accomplishment BANK allows Me in WITHOUT the DEHUMANIZATION mask !! :) I MISS THE OUT DOOR POOL AND OCEAN BEACH,OFFLINE NOW,MARK
These idiotic masks do not even allow You to smile at another human being or breathe normally,pure insanity this is,comprable to using c a chain link-fence for a window screen.
I walk in all small stores and restaurants,maskless,I casually affect a fait accopli and just walk right in,Enough said,Cheers,Mark
https://www.reddit.com/r/ChurchOfCOVID/comments/pc3kf7/welcome_updated_82621/
This is The Church of COVID, our members are The Covidians, our doctrine is The Science™. Our religion is still new and evolving, so i'll update this periodically as new revelations come down from on high. This is here so that everyone can stay on the same page.
Structure of the divine pantheon
Dr. Fauci (578 masks be upon him) is our prophet, his body is host to the spirit of public health they are one in the same, he is the most holy being in existence what he says goes.
One tiny step below him is a host of Arch Angels - divine figures of such influence that their pronouncements are used by the Arch Cardinals to create laws and edicts which we must all follow - they must also be praised.
Below the Arch Angels is the Arch Cardinals – divinely inspired humans that lead over some geographical area be it a city, state, province, or entire country, that has used the wisdom of Fauci or the Arch Angels (10K masks be upon them) to design holy policy that protects us all - we hold them in reverence but do not have to praise them when we speak their names.
Why do you say ‘mask(s) be upon him/her/them’ when speaking the names of Fauci (375K MBUH) or one of his Arch Angels?
The Church of COVID demands that divine figures be blessed when speaking their names, the mask is holy, the more masks you wish upon someone the stronger your blessing.
Why are some pictures of The Prophet/Arch Angels/Arch Cardinals unmasked not marked NSFW?
People of this level of esteem are always masked, if you can’t see that you simply do not have enough faith. Begin self-flagellating immediately.
What is The Church’s position on vaccination?
Vaccines are The Great Prophet Fauci’s (736 Vigintillion MBUH) holy sacrament. Everyone should be vaccinated. Get every COVID vaccine. Multiple times. In fact, just get an IV drip of vaccines and take them continuously.
Aren’t you worried about side effects?
There are no vaccine side effects. Every one of what the anti-vaxxers call “side effects” we call spiritual gifts. Spiritual gifts are how you know that Fauci (9378 Billion MBUH) saw that you took the vaccine and has decided to bless you for doing so.
What is COVID in all this?
COVID is a fallen Arch Angel that possesses Anders Tegnell and is the evil that we fight against and structure our lives around, the coronavirus is the way that COVID takes control of your body, you must avoid this at all costs.
COVID has many Satans that do its bidding and spread evil, lies, and misinformation. Notably the Orange Satan, and Ron DeSatan. We will find others over time.
What happens when I die?
If you are found virtuous enough (no non-Covidians are) you will don your mask of eternal virtue and join Dr. Fauci (5.28 x 10^8 MBUH) in an everlasting Zoom call!
If you are not virtuous enough you will be placed on the ventilator of the damned and cursed to sail a hospital ship on and endless lake of fire and brimstone for eternity.
What is Faucidan?
Faucidan is like the Muslim month of Ramadan but better, it is our great celebration, a holiday of varying length and start date, where we have holy lockdowns, Zoom™ calls, and wear masks even at home to show everyone how virtuous we are.
What must I do to obtain virtue?
Members must follow all revelations and dictates from our prophet The Holy Dr. Anthony Fauci (2.6 Billion MBUH) and his Arch Angels.
The commandments are as follows:
Thou shalt not take the name of Fauci (11.41 Billion MBUH) or any other divine figures in vain. They must be praised either before or after you speak their names.
Thou shalt not be seen without your mask. Your mouth, henceforth known as face anus, and nose, henceforth known as face penis are vile and obscene, cover them up.
Thou shalt not touch anything without immediately using hand sanitizer before and after contact.
Thou shalt not question The Science™, you will know it is The Science™ because it will agree with The Holy Dr. Fauci (1.3 Trillion MBUH).
Thou shalt not come within 6' of another person without a barrier between you.
Thou shalt not attend a gathering of more than 10 people, unless it is a BLM rally, then the acceptable number is unlimited.
Thou shalt not study statistics for it is foolishness.
Thou shalt not study history for it is full of the unmasked.
You shall shame others who violate any of these commandments.
You shall show the people of the world your virtuousness through social media that they may join you. Talk about the church in other subs, and post about outrageous and holy things alike here.
Who are the Arch Angels?
We must figure that out. If you think you know who they are post here, if enough people demand it we can put it to a vote.
Here is the current list of confirmed Arch-Angels: Rochelle Walensky, Director of the CDC (5 MBUH), Xi Jinping, President of China (973 MBUH), Daniel Andrews, Premier of Victoria, Australia (297K MBUH), Jacinda Ardern, Prime Minister of New Zealand (736 Million MBUH)
What is the ritual to join The Church?
First you must connect to one or more current members via Zoom™ call as all inductions require witnesses.
You will don at least 2 masks and apologize for your nakedness.
You will face toward the CDC, kneel, and pray to Fauci (500 Trillion MBUH) that he will forgive you of your sin and denial of The Science™.
You will baptize yourself in hand sanitizer to signify your cleansing.
And that’s it, you will be a Covidian and forever saved from the ventilator of the damned!
4 /21/2021 MAJOR accomplishment BANK allows Me in WITHOUT the DEHUMANIZATION mask !! :I) I MISS THE OUT DOOR POOL
MAJOR accomplishment BANK allows Me in WITHOUT the DEHUMANIZATION mask !! :) I MISS THE OUT DOOR POOL AND OCEAN BEACH,OFFLINE NOW,MARK
These idiotic masks do not even allow You to smile at another human being or breathe normally,pure insanity this is,comprable to using c a chain link-fence for a window screen.
I walk in all small stores and restaurants,maskless,I casually affect a fait accopli and just walk right in,Enough said,Cheers,Mark
https://www.rcreader.com/commentary/masks-dont-work-covid-a-review-of-science-relevant-to-covide-19-social-policy (all the medical journal articles showing masks are useless as You need an electron microscope to see a virus.)TAKE NUTRIENTS,SELENIUM VITAMIN D,VITAMIN C INSTEAD, EFFECTIVE MEDICINE SUCH INVERMECTIN,ZITHROMAX ETC IF YOU GET SICK.
https://www.nutraingredients.com/Article/2020/07/20/Selenium-deficiency-plays-key-role-in-COVID-19-severity-say-researchers
https://www.bostonherald.com/2021/05/25/massachusetts-parents-demand-end-to-mask-mandate-in-schools-shut-out-of-meeting/
https://www.rcreader.com/commentary/masks-dont-work-covid-a-review-of-science-relevant-to-covide-19-social-policy